Things Men ask about

About swinging, group sex?

Unless you are in your relationship only because of sex and lust, and give up other values for the sake of "new experiences", I would strongly discourage any serious wish for swinging and switching partners. The feelings of jealousy and mistrust are absolutely inevitable once you know your partner has had sex with another, and are likely to damage your relationship irreversably. If you look out for new experiences, have somebody watch you make love, film yourselves as porn stars, have sex in public places, but do not let anybody touch your partner, if you care for your relationship. Talking about your swinging and group sex fantasies is all right, make jokes, watch videos other people do it, but do not make it real in your relationship.

Men perhaps are more easy-going about group sex, because women are first to catch the "whore" halo once doing it, while quite some men may regard it as "a fun thing to do".



How to get her to swallow?

That's life, women don't like to swallow. Again you will need to tell her you want her to swallow, she won't guess it telepathically, won't read your mind and it's pretty impossible to lead by example. The odds are you will be ignored, unless you put your desire expressly.

Do something to show you want to minimise her suffering. Do not make her swallow, after more than a few day period without sex, because after pauses men ejaculate much greater load of semen. Theoretically, you can make your semen taste sweeter by eating fruit such as bananas, melons and strawberies, and preferring vegetarian menu to salty and spicy meals and meat. Such diet for most men however is not easy to keep.

Another helpful idea is to use reciprocity principle - she will be much happier to do something special for you if you do something special for her, so prepare to go down on her, and remember that most women love it, but are shy to admit and ask for it. You can organise "the total oral sex session", when you do for each other whatever you desire. Once again, find and watch videos where women happily swallow semen. Not that easy to find, since in most cases men finish on her face, but some should be around.

Finally, reassess your wants, maybe finishing on her face or simply finishing when she stimulates your penis with her hand is quite perfectly all right with you. After all there is not much gain from her swallowing your semen, apart from cleaner sheets.


How to get her to give head?

First of all, if she is not taking your penis in her mouth sooner or later you will have to ask for it. You can be more or less direct in expressing your wish. She has to know that you really like it when she sucks your penis. Be direct and say it "I'd like you to take my penis in your mouth," or "I'd love if you gave me a small blowjob". Look and be serious when you say it.

For a more indirect convincing, once again watching porn videos is a powerful tool. Choose the ones where women give men nice blowjobs and it looks easy and they look pretty satisfied on the job. After all blowjob is a very straightforward and achievable task, and she can clearly see your satisfaction. It just has to occur to her that giving head is something normal and common, something most women as a part of the sex play. From my experience, most who avoid giving blowjobs do so because they feel a psychological barrier to do it, not because it is very difficult to do physically.

If you want to be a nice guy, you can ask her for blowjob leading by example. Go down on her. To emphasize watch sex videos where women and men go down on each other before the intercourse, and women also suck penis after the intercourse, which is a very commonly found scenario indeed.

Another point. Men are pigs. Yes, because astounding number of men still are doing very poorly with personal hygiene. Wash your penis and balls thoroughly before offering them for licking, because they do sweat and have stronger or weaker unpleasant smell. Personal hygiene matters highly for all women, also with respect to nail clipping, fresh breath, smell from under-arms and dirty toes. So keep your genitals fresh and appealing if you want them to serve as a lolly-pop.

If you really like your partner giving you a blowjob, tell it to her, tell she is the best cock-sucker in the world. People like being the best, no matter the category.

If she gives you a blowjob, be nice to warn her before ejaculation, as most women don't like the surprise bursts of semen in their mouth or on the face.


How to finger a woman?

Be gentle and start off by arousing her before actually getting down to fingering. The right way to finger her is probably with two fingers, as one is two small and more is somewhat cumbersome. Make sure your nails are neatly clipped not to hurt her vagina's gentle tissue with the nail edges.

It is advisable to make her somewhat wet before actually penetrating her with your fingers. If she easily wets herself that is no problem, but otherwise tease her senses with a tip of your tongue around her clitoris, the upper part of her pussy a little bit. Then insert the tip of your index finger inside her and feel around, you should be able to easily tell in which direction to go deeper. Let your finger movement be smooth. You can slightly wet your finger with saliva before moving into her.

When you feel comfortable with one finger, take it out and move slowly with two fingers - index and middle ones. If you want her to feel really good add a rhytmic round motion with the other hand around her clitoral area above the two inserted fingers. Steadily move your two fingers in and out. If you insert them in a way that your fingernails are facing down, you can simulatneously apply a pressure with the palm of the same hand on her clitoral area. It would feel great for her.

The advantage of fingering her is that you can clearly feel if she is climaxing, as you should be able to feel her muscle contractions around your fingers when she comes. The difficult part is to make her feel accustomed to your fingers, because they are not the soft parts of the human body. But if you do not apply overly strong presure and wrong angles everything should be great.


A nice technique to give her a special orgasm?

If you want to give her a really special orgasm, you have to do something out of the routine. She has to be really aroused to reach the heights of orgasm. One of the most special things you can give to her in sex is your time, as you most likely may have noticed that in your relationship sex intercourses tend to get shorter and shorter, just because you have to run your everyday errands all the time. To give it special to her you have to be special to her. Set time apart so both of you know you don't have to rush.

It really depends on her where she likes to have rush, but change of location if she is comfortable with it, brings more excitement, because sex feels much more fresh. If you stay in your usual appartment or house, try to change a room, for more unusual experience try going and having sex somewhere out, a hotel, a car or nature. But remember it should not feel cheap for her otherwise it is a flop, and good personal hygiene facilities should be readily available.

Give your time to her in the actual intercourse as well if you want to make it special for her. Tease, tease, tease. Have prepared a bunch of dirty jokes and some sex stories to tell your women, even slightly aroused women love having been told sexy things, and as you can't keep original for the whole night anyway, why not tell a story. First tease her mind, then her body. Ideally it should be comfortable for both of you to lie and be relaxed, not to get cold or uncomfortable in any way, and stay 100% private. Caress her breasts, caress her legs. Let her leave some sexy clothes on, many women really have sex fetish of clothes they love, or check out sex with her wearing high-heels.

Let's face it if you want to make her feel special, you will have to work with your tongue and lips some, because it is the only way a woman's body would tolerate prolonged stimulation, because tongue's touch is really gentle yet stimulating on her, while fingers, hand and aroused penis are somewhat hard on her. Let her lie down and stimulate her vaginal area with your tongue for a few minutes. Then have a rest and have a talk for a minute. Then go down on her again, then rest up again. Allow her to change positions for a more fresh feel. Then go down on her again. Then rest up again.

When you feel that she has become really wet, only then she will be ready for your penis. Once more, remember to choose a position so that your underbelly rubs against her vaginal area and keep steady rhythm when thrusting. Ideally, if she has been properly aroused she should be climaxing really fast, otherwise probably the foreplay was not thorough enough.


How can I prolong the intercourse?

Quite many men at some point of their sex lives have to go through the quite humiliating experience of too fast ejaculation, which also completely disrupts her chances to climax in the intercourse. Here are some good remedies that will make him last longer:

* Starting the intercourse with a woman-on-top position is one of the the best ways that help many men last longer, because she controls the rhythm and he cannot speed up the penetration tempo, which typically leads to quick ejaculation. Furthermore the woman-on-top position is somewhat uncomfortable for him, because he has to carry the weight of the woman, which distracts his attention from orgasm and helps to last longer.
* The more often he will have sex, the longer will he last. He will always be able to last much longer the second time you have sex in a short while. Even if he cums very early the first time, it may not be his real orgasm, just the ejaculation, and he is very likely to be ready for much more action in just 15-30 minutes.
* Another advice is that he should learn to strain his bottom muscles, which help to control ejaculation. Just try to hold it sometimes when you pee to see how it works.
* Oral stimulation before the actual sex also helps to make him last longer.
* Finally, after intial stage of men's sex life, most men learn to and partly due to aging reasons do not finish that fast.


What is the best way to give her oral sex?

Most women will climax and do it reasonably fast, if you first arouse them. Watching a porn video is a great great help to get her aroused, even if she does not admit it consciously. Then you can play around her genital area with your tongue for a short while. Unless you are not overly aggressive tongue movements tend to produce light, even ticklish feeling for her. By such introduction she starts to concentrate on her body and the pleasure you are about to bring.

Then insert a finger slightly in her pussy and focus with your tongue on her clitoral area, the upper part of her pussy, just where the hood is. Make sure the nail of the finger you are inserting is neatly clipped. All kinds of round motions work best when stimulating her clitoral area with your tongue.

You should feel with your finger that her pussy becomes slightly more open and relaxed. Then insert two fingers in her pussy as far as you comfortably can. Don't press your hand against her pussy front wall hardly, but don't leave the halfway either. Two fingers for most couples should work best, as two are small enough not to hurt her and big enough to feel and squeeze them.

Rest your head lightely just above her pussy for your comfort and additional area stimulation close to her most senitive spots and make generally round movements with your tongue and lips on the upper part of her pussy. The two fingers in her pussy can generally even stand still, or slightly move, there is no need to finger-fuck her aggressively, as her vaginal muscles will squeeze the fingers themselves. You can keep your index and middle finger in her pussy and make additional clitoral area stimulation with your thumb, while licking her clitoral area with your mouth. Remember that rhythmical round movements work best.

If you keep a wet and stimulating contact with her pussy and mostly concentrate on its upper part, it should bring her a really good clitoral orgasm. When she climaxes, you should be feeling light pressure from the squeezing and contracting movements of her muscles around your two fingers. When you feel it, it means you have done a great job. She should be lying on her back when you eat her pussy, you can put a pillow under her hips for raised pussy and easier access with your mouth. Let her close her eyes when you give her oral sex. Most women like it when you don't look at their face when eating her pussy, because it makes them shy and distracts their concentration.


How to make her horny?

There are quite a few comprehensive rule books out there about seducing women. In the real life it is never as easy, but here are some of the best ideas that I think are worth noting:

* Act fast - the first rule out there is whenever you see a beautiful girl that catches your eye, act immediately within a few seconds. You will be forgiven for doing something stupid, saything something stupid or saying nothing special, but your chances drop to zero if you do nothing, stand back and stare at her from time to time, and undecisevely approach her later.
* Talk to girls - the best way to date girls is to initiate conversations with girls whenever possible. Talk to them even if you are not specifically trying to pitch them, just be an attractive person to talk to and you'll feel extremely comfortable being with a girl. Being confident pays big time because women don't like wimps, they look for men who are ready to provide and confidence signals that.
* Art of talking - you spend 90% of time together with a girl talking, so your conversational skills are important. The art of seduction teaches that the most important thing to lay a girl is, first, to get her thinking about something good, about positive feelings, her positive experiences and achievements, and later to drive the conversation to get her thinking about sex.
* Keywords - some claim the best way to make a woman hot with talk is to scatter your language with sexual keywords, even if the talk is not about sex. Play with positive and sexual words like "great, best, top, good, together, us, connection, ride, inside, enter, penetrate".
* Thoughts - a woman will want sex if she has been thinking sexual thoughts. That can be used or misused. But the idea is if you have established good contact with a woman or simply want to make your girlfriend hot and horny, you have to make her start thinking about sex. Don't get me wrong she will love it, as sex following the state of arousal is much greater for women as compared to sex without arousal. You can be sure of one thing - if you tell a woman dirty jokes, tell her some sex stories, or watch together sex video and she is still there with you not breaking the contact, then she is thinking about sex and chances are she is pretty wet, admitting it or not.


She won't orgasm. What do I do

Women usually don't reach orgasm if they are not sufficiently aroused before the intercoure and if their clitoris does not receive enough attention. Women have to be aroused, because otherwise penetration becomes rather painful for them, and pain takes over the positive sexual feelings. Clitoris has to be stimulated, because it is normally the source of woman's orgasm.

Women can be aroused by watching a porn video together, talking about sex, telling sex stories, dirty jokes. She has to be thinking about sex before sex for best results.

Clitoris (the upper part of her pussy where the inner lips meet) can be best stimulated with oral sex, licking all around that area, and making circular motions with your tongue and lips, aiding the stimulation with your hand from time to time. It helps if two fingers are inserted and kept in the vagina at the same time.

If you want to stimulate clitoris in the straight sex, you have to choose the position where your belly rubs around her under belly (where the clitoral area is), or a position when you can stimulate that area with your hand. Such positions are an elevated missionary postion (man-on-top) with a pillow under her bottom. Alternatively, you can put her on her back on the table, while standing yourself near the edge of the table, slightly bending over her to rub her clitoral area with your underbelly, while not laying your whole bodyweight on her as in missionary position, thus allowing her more relaxation and less distraction.


What clitoris exactly is, how to stimulate it?

The clitoris is the female sexual organ found in the upper side of the pussy where the inner lips meet. It consists of a rounded area or head, called the glans, and a longer part, called the shaft, which contains cavernous bodies similar to those of the penis. The tissue of the inner lips normally covers the shaft of the clitoris, making a hood to protect it. The only directly visible part of the clitoris is a small smooth glans. The size and shape of the clitoris vary considerably among women. It can be seen by gently pulling back the skin of the hood.

There is a high concentration of nerve endings in the clitoris and the area close to it, which makes it very sensitive to touch and pressure. Stimulation of the clitoral area is generally very sexually pleasurable. Moreover, providing the women with sexual pleasure is the only known function of the clitoris.

When a woman becomes sexually aroused, both the glans and the shaft fill with blood and increase in size. The glans can double in diameter. There is no evidence that a larger clitoris means more intense sexual arousal. As erotic stimulation continues and orgasm approaches, the clitoris becomes less visible as it is covered by the hood.

About 10-15 minutes after orgasm the clitoris returns to its normal size, because the orgasm leads to a dispersal of the accumulated blood. If the woman doesn't have an orgasm, the blood that has flowed into the clitoris as a result of sexual arousal may remain there, keeping the clitoris enlarged for a few hours. Many women find this uncomfortable.

A woman's clitoris can be stimulated through direct or indirect contact. During intercourse the penis does not contact the clitoris directly. The thrusting of the penis in the vagina usually moves the inner lips and this movement of the lips against the clitoris creates the orgasm. Direct contact with the clitoris by touching it with a finger, vibrator, or a tongue can cause more discomfort than pleasure for many women, especially if the woman is not well aroused. For these women, more gentle overall rubbing or licking of the area around the clitoris is likely to produce better results. However, there are women that enjoy very intense direct stimulation. My advice is that rhythmic round motion with your tongue around her clitoral area (the upper part of the pussy) usually works best.